God Bless the Broken Road: How to be Thankful for Your Trials
Mood Music: Bless the Broken Road by Rascal Flatts
In the last few years I’ve lost:
My grandmother who was more like a second mother
Two aunts
My first Sunday school teacher and her husband who were like a second set of grandparents to me and their two sons who were like uncles
My first and only love during a break in our friendship
Six family friends
My favorite grade school teacher who was still in my life
Five of my most favorite entertainers – Michael, Whitney, Prince, Andy Williams, and Robbin Gibb
A long term job I was unfairly fired from
A very depressing job I walked out on
Five long term friendships
And almost my mind. . .
While all of my friends were dancing, going out and enjoying their young woman and manhood I was at home mourning all that I’d lost.
I was depressed, anxious and lonely for the greater portion of the last nine years, and at one point I went in to hiding.
Between the job I was fired from and the job I walked out, on there was a three-month lack of employment. During that period I probably left my house about ten times. A large percentage of those times were for interviews.
Each heartbreak left me a little more afraid and anxious. I will admit that each death listed hurt badly, even it marginally, but honestly three of the above just about took me to the grave too.
I became literally physically ill after one, to the point of needing prescription drugs. Nighttime became a time for me of not only unbelievable physical pain, but also mental agony. I’d either catch a few hours of sleep or be haunted with nightmares of the ones I lost.
My mom was straight with me and told me she feared I’d grieve myself to death and in fact I almost did. But with the help of God, reading some powerful books, attending church, prayer, and time, I am alive and stronger than I’ve ever been in my life.
I went through a period of childish self-pity and declarations of ‘woe is me’ But now I can honestly say God bless the broken road and here is how.
Eliminating Self-Pity
Self-pity is a natural thing after bad circumstances continually happen to you. You feel sorry for your situation and you began to live out your grief.
It may start with lack of caring for appearance, then lack of caring about your surroundings, then the next thing you know you may find yourself in bed all weekend or recounting sad stories over and over again to the people around you.
You feel sorry for you and you want the world to feel just as sorry too, but this is a destructive mode of living. Self-pity gets you no where. It doesn’t help you move on and it surely does nothing for helping you reclaim your life.
You must find a way to push past your situation and not allow yourself to be down for no more than a few weeks. Studies have proven it takes just two weeks to develop a habit. Therefore, if you spend more than two weeks celebrating your self-pity, so to speak, you have trained yourself to be down perpetually. This behavior is now a habit and we all know how hard habits are to break.
Once you move past self-pity, you will be able to see the blessings in the lessons.
Everything is for a Reason
What if I told you everything in your life happened for a reason and not a reason to hurt you, but to help you in moving toward greatness?
Your response after heartbreak should not be to look at your feelings, but to look at what you have learned.
My time of difficulty helped me to learn beautiful life-long lessons.
Televangelist Joyce Meyers was molested by her father and an uncle for years as a child. She admits, though she hates that such a horrendous thing happened, she wouldn’t be able to reach so many people without that hurtful experience.
We have a tendency as humans to harp on the pain, but that pain was happened and we have to find a way to muster strength and move past it. The most beautiful thing you can do with your hurt is make it count.
Turn your agony into something meaningful such as an organization, a poem, a song, a book or simply a personal story that helps others going through the same thing.
See the Big Picture
I have learned to make peace with my pain. I now understand that all these initially unpleasant moments have brought me to today and I am thankful.
I miss so many people, I miss so many friends, I miss so many things that will never be again, but I am thankful- just so incredibly thankful- to be who I am now.
I know that all the people I miss are happy with Jesus, all the friends I lost were never friends from the start, I am bigger than all the jobs that I left, and I am moving forward.
I am taking control of my life and my purpose. My future is bright and I am going to have love, happiness, and peace of mind eventually. So will you.
You, my friend, may have endured so much more than me, but one day you will smile, laugh and be amazingly happy. You will learn to look at each lesson and see each and every blessing. You too will look at your life soon and say, “God bless the broken road.”
Hugs to you all as you go through whatever adversity you may be dealing with. I promise you it all gets easier in time.
Just continue to maintain a positive outlook. Remember, I love you all and I am praying for you!