Emotional Vampirism: How to Protect yourself
Mood Music: Fake Love by Drake
When I was in college there were lots of authors and celebrities that visited our university free of charge or at a discounted price for students. This is probably why I am still playing pat-a-cake with my student loans, but I digress.
One person who came for a speaking engagement at the university was an author claiming she was a real vampire, but instead of drinking blood for sustenance she was born with a heart condition that rendered her lethargic. To stay active, she allegedly sucked a degree of energy from willing friends and family members.
She claimed it was something she only did with consent, because not only did it make people feel drowsy, it also created a bond that could easily become unhealthy and obsessive for her ‘victims’.
I felt entertained by the story, but I was sure to roll my eyes after I heard it. It just felt a little too incredulous for me to believe.
However, as I started to live more and hang out with certain people I noticed unnatural shifts in my personality and acknowledged there might be some validity to this author’s story. I learned there was a more dangerous kind of predator- emotional vampires
What it is?
Emotional Vampirism is a relatively new psychological concept that means a person can harp on your energy and drain you emotionally.
I became aware, on some level, of this notion when I begain working with a certain person. This co-worker an I had been acquaintances, for years but when we began working whole eight hour shifts together I noticed a strange change in emotion.
This girl swung moods like the grass skirt on the hips of a Hula dancer. Happy, sad, mad, rabid anger, then angelic. The literal energy field around her could make lights flicker.
I explained to you guys that I am a highly sensitive person so people’s moods affect me anyway (Living Life as A Highly Sensitive Person), but I started having physical pain too. Headaches, backaches, tiredness, and mood swings to the point I started calling off from work at least twice a month. I even had a doctor’s visit because I thought I was literally dying.
However one glorious day she quit and my whole world changed. I was me again- chipper, energetic, healthy me! This strange turn of events and another coworker confessing she made them feel the same way as well, caused me to start monitoring myself emotionally after hanging with certain people.
At the time. I had a crazy euphoric friend that after I left his presence I was bouncing off the wall all night. A very depressed and angery “friend” who drained the hell out of me to the point of having zero energy after we hung out.
I decided that emotional vampirism is a real phenomenon, but I wasn’t fully aware of how dangerous it could be until I watched a documentary on Charles Manson.
The Greatest Emotional Vampire of Them All
This past Halloween weekend The History Chanel did a documentary on Charles Manson. I am sure you know Manson was a super predator responsible for the murders of seven people most notably that of pregnant actress Sharon Tate, but to me the most frightening thing about him is the ability he had to harp on the emotions of people and lead them to trust him.
He had been a shady figure his entire life, but he gained enough trust to move in with one of the Beach Boys, have two wives and several children, and create a ‘family’ comprised of lost young men and women to help aid him in heinous murders.
The reason Manson had so much leverage, in my opinion, is because he is an emotional vampire.
When a person is being controlled, so to speak, by an emotional vampire, an individual has absolutely no idea that it’s happening at first. You might have a few emotional and physical symptoms that let you know something is amiss, but basically you are clueless of being controlled.
Let me give you a practical example. Has someone ever said something rude to hurt your feelings or offend your pride?
You probably walked away from the situation feeling sad with your emotional energy lowered and that person probably walked away feeling good because their emotional energy has been raised by robbing you of your own.
The emotional vampire’s entire focus is to rob you of emotional energy to higher their own feelings of worth. They practice a control over you without you being totally aware.
Now think of the people in your life. Is there someone who constantly lowers your mood or energy? This person is an probably an emotional vampire and you should be cautious .
Why? because with lowered vibrational energy you are more susceptible to being controlled and an unhealthy bond being created.
The people we remember most in our lives are those who have been very kind to us or those who bullied or hurt us.
High emotional energy exchanges (negative or positive) create bonds, that’s why many people stay with their abusers for many years and why we all enjoy the company of people who lift us up.
The addition or subtraction of energies gives us some type of subconscious thrill that keeps us coming back for more.
In best cast scenario, you learn to love someone who lifts you up because it’s refreshing and adds to your emotional energy.
In the worst case, you become addicted to the hurt of having your virbrationally energy robbed and that negative experience starts defining your self-worth.
Sometimes we make ungodly soul ties with those who hurt us and are burdened by energies that are not our own. Just like the Manson “Family”.
How to Cope With Emotional Vampirism
The best way to deal with emotional vampirism is to know the three steps of defense- recognizing praying, leaving.
First start recognizing you have an emotional vampire in your life by checking your feelings after talking to a person.
Do you feel cold, tired, mad, upset, or depressed after nearly every conversation or encounter? Its naturally to not always feel happy and energetic after talking to someone, because that’s just not a reality, but if you feel weird more than you feel at least like yourself- something is very wrong.
Now that you know that something is wrong pray. Ask God to reveal a person’s intentions to you and I am speaking from experience- he will always do it.
It can come in any form- a particularly nasty argument, remembered facts, or some other sign or wonder.
When you are shown, asked God for the strength to leave, protection from harm, and a spirit of discernment for next time an emotional vampire comes into your life.
Lastly, leave. No excuses, just leave the relationship alone if you can.
I hope this information aides you in your social, business, and personal endeavors
I must admit I’ve paused on writing this for days at a time because it was a bit creepy, but very factual. Best of luck and keep reading !